I know you're being sarcastic, and I'll probably get downvoted to shit for this, but you actually aren't so wrong. Cultural beliefs and religions have been around longer than the internet and die hard. Believe it or not, mountains actually at one time slowed communication and still influence how cultures change, although the influence is more pronounced in countries that aren't as advanced as America.

Anyway, port cities and coastal areas tend to be more liberal due to a constant inflow of new people, thoughts and ideas, while the more inland places tend to change more slowly. You also seem to forget that America was founded by religious zealots that were thrown out of England and many of them migrated away from the big cities, to the plains of America. Until the advent of the phones and internet, people relied on travelers carrying news/letters to pass on information. So, yes, it has a lot to do with why the middle of America is so Christian and conservative.

All that being said, America is not a country that is heavily segregated by mountains, more or less gets along as a country/people (despite what the mass media or ridiculous politicians would tell you) and is not regularly having regional conflicts. By comparison, look at a relief map of the Balkans and Carpathians, China or Northern Caucasus and then look at all the conflicts that have been in these regions throughout history.

References: Revenge of Geography by Robert Kaplan https://www.stratfor.com/analysis/problems-foreign-powers-find-balkans https://www.stratfor.com/video/history-north-caucasus-instability http://pulitzercenter.org/reporting/eurasia-caucasus-soviet-union-tsarnaev-boston-marathon-chechnya-dagestan-georgia-armenia-azerbaijan-culture-geography-violence-religion-conflict