Wow this is very sad, if it was myself i would put my childs family first, knowing me i would deffinatley pay them back and a little extra even if it left me high n dry. As well this way if things didnt work out i wouldnt feel so horrible if i needed another helping hand. Im so glad my mum makes an amazing inlaw, she gives my wifes previous child pocket money and spent a good hundred pounds on her for xmas and would take her out now and again. My inlaws as much as i love them they cause a lot of problems between me and my wifes other children, like they will tell me the girls where wrong to do something and then tell them I was wrong to do it. Also my wifes child who is no longer talking to me or my wife told me that my inlaws dont like me and think im a waste of space of course this has been denied, i dont really mind what they think it just hurts when you put ALOT of effort into making people feel welcome. Basically that one child fell out with me because i was for my sister being gay and i wasnt against gay marraige. But i guess everyone has their views and that has to be respected. I just wish it didnt go as far as not letting my wife see her grandchildren because of a silly grudge against me. Its just so confusing that the inlaws are alowed but the mum isnt and i really feel the inlaws are not making the situation any better, saying this i dont think its intentual , just one of thise situations trying to keep everyone happy.but when you tell one person one thing and another another thing, its going to end ugly. I thought women were complicated but when there are 5 girls involved who all seen to be against each other its so hard to understand what is going on lol