when i kissed a girl for the first time. i was dating a man for a while, and i had this feeling really deep down that something was wrong. him being my best friend, i came out to him, and his response was "i know you, and you are not a lesbian". the relationship quickly became abusive and after i left him, i started dating a woman. the first time i kissed her, i swear to god my life changed. it was so nice, like fireworks, and i felt warm inside. i finally understood why people wrote love songs. when i had kissed my ex, his lips were cold and wet, and i was turned off by his body. i stayed with him because he wouldn't let me leave. my realization that a breakup isn't a joint decision freed me to discover who i am.