[Serious] When was a moment where you were 99% sure you were going to die?

I was working in remote area on the far west coast of northern US. I was told to dispose of a 50 gallon barrel of fuel by putting it on a large already burning fire. Obviously that's stupid so I said no, only to meet the response implying that I would be fired if I didnt. Being remote as I was and without much money I didnt really have a choice.

What you think happened, happened. I tried to be safe, I got the other guy out of the way, but it blew up less than 10 feet from me. I remember turning away and seeing the flames wrap around me. I was blown off my feet, I was on fire. I tried to roll, it didnt work. I threw off my jacket which took most of it, I got up and drove my head into a puddle on the ground, then I shoved my hands into some snow after the water couldn't put them out.

Once my adrenaline ran its course, I laid on my back and just watched the sky. I knew my coworkers heard me screaming, but I also knew that it would be several hours until a jump plane, or the coast guard could come get me, and another few hours to get to the nearest hospital.

I admit, I let go. My friend onsite saved my life by literally slapping the less burnt side of my face so I could stay conscious. But that relief is intoxicating? Dont know if that makes sense. Eventually a pilot who was in the area heard our radio and luckily he was only an hour out. I made it to the nearest town, then I was medivac'd to a larger burn unit where I spent a month there.

It's been less than a year since that happened, and I'd be lying if I said I wasnt experiencing some trauma from it. I have nightmares, flashbacks, random panic attacks, I cant even go to the gas station without having one. Most of my scarring has gone away, except for my hands and neck, but the mental part is far worse. Sometimes I wish I died up there.

/r/AskReddit Thread