There was a guy in my friend group when I first moved to college that I never liked. I would always feel uneasy around him and the more I got to know him the more I would feel this kind of hate build up in me towards him. He was the kind of guy that would make racist and hateful comments and then judge by everyone's reactions whether or not he was "joking" or not. It was a pretty open fact that I didn't like the guy and didn't want to be around him to the entire friend group but when asked why, I had a hard time putting into words why I felt that way. It was just a very serious gut feeling. About a year into knowing him and normally not staying anywhere that he was, we were at the same party and I figured I'd do my best to tolerate him since I had no real reason to outright hate him.

He raped me at that party.

He forced me into a bedroom and raped me. I was devastated. I failed all my classes that semester, going into academic probation and came very close to dropping out. I stopped hanging out with anyone from that group of friends (I actually stopped hanging out with anyone for a long time, most of my time was spent alone in my room) and I tried my best to forget it. I was too disgusted and ashamed and mixed up to go to the police or anyone about it right away. A few months later I found out that several other people in the group of my "friends" had seen what was happening and did nothing to stop it. It's like a crappy consolation prize to know my gut feeling about this guy was right but also my gut feeling about the first friends I made at a college was completely wrong considering many of them enabled this kind of disgusting behavior. Anyway, I trust my gut feelings a lot more now, even when I have no way to explain why I feel the way I do.