Thanks for the reply. I've never been officially diagnosed with anything. I went to a psychiatrist when I started to get confused about my feelings of depression and anxiety, and general unhappiness relationship wise. They intimidated me so I stopped going after a few sessions. I do not know much about PTSD, but at the start of this year I started to feel a bit calmer with my thoughts. Since Covid, I've sort of mentally untangled back into how severely painful the flashbacks are and the overall worry that my health presents in the face of Covid. I'm young, sure, but still. Perhaps you are right and it's why I am plagued with thoughts of looming death, but I never suspected it as strongly as the past few months. I'm losing certain aspects of caring that others might uphold.

I have not read that book. I am sorry you too face health problems, especially the more severe one like cancer. I appreciate your response and maybe I can answer more questions you have if you have thoughts.