let's see here

when I was 15 I tried smoking pot a couple times, when I was 16 I drank a few times, then started smoking pot very regularly, by 18 basically smoked every day but only drinking every now and then like every couple weekends or so maybe more maybe less. Also at 18 I tried shrooms, molly, and coke. When I was 19 I started doing coke more regularly, pain killers when they were around, tripping, rolling, whenever I could. 20 my coke use increased but I went in and out of phases, few months on few months off. Around 21-22 I started doing oxys every other weekend, along with coke sometimes, then stopped for a while. Cravings for opiates got super fucking bad and at 23 I started doing heroin. Used every single day for 8 months, did outpatient rehab and got clean for seven months. Relapsed for a month, got clean again and been clean from heroin for six months now. When I got clean the last time I got back into coke pretty heavy, stopped for a few months and now I've been smoking crack a couple times a week for a few months now. Sprinkle some occasional amphetamine and benzo use throughout the years and there's my history. I just turned 25. If I don't kick this crack shit now I'm probably gonna have to do another rehab program. I fucking hate being an addict. I just hate myself tbh