I admire your passion! I will give it a shot and would appreciate any insights.

Background: 29yo M. My primary interests seem to centralize around exploring spiritual texts written by those who "founded" religions, mostly eastern ones at the moment. So I'd say I'm interested in the teachings of Lau Tzu and Buddha more than Taoism or Buddhism, and in the case of your example I'm more interested in Jesus than Christianity. I take their knowledge and integrate it into myself so I can be more aware and see more clearly, and I've noticed I automatically end up participating in this function of clarifying things for others as a result, though I try to avoid being too helpful as it has made others overly reliant on me in the past (an ongoing challenge). I'm also interested in Psychology, self improvement (though not typically for the sake of external ambition but rather individuation/self actualization, however that looks), meditation, the unconscious, the mind, the unique interplay within humans/universe. I work in an lgbtq+ non-profit at the moment but my heart isn't fully in it as it involves participating in a lot of systems of thought that don't feel helpful to me. I'm content working non-glamorous jobs though, I could work in a grocery store or something if it frees up my mind for my Ni interests.

Goals/Ideals: My primary "goal" at the moment is self actualization/understanding, which is quite abstract but I use everything. A few months ago I started working on some "art" for no clear purpose other than to externalize my insights, but which I'm starting to see could potentially serve as a catalyst for people to look more deeply within themselves and the mysteries of the universe, and to get them questioning the deepest foundations of their beliefs. I believe this alone would contribute to more compassion and goodness in the world, people questioning what they believe and looking within. I'd like to be able to share my insights with others because they're so significant for me (I was on the verge of destruction until my mind opened) but my confidence fluctuates and I don't like attracting too much attention (though I tend to by default). I can get overwhelmed by others' needs so I tend to withdraw and suppress my true nature. I'm planning for my art to be anonymous, partly for this reason but also because I believe distancing it from my social persona will make it more personal for others, and my main goal is to touch their hearts. I think having my identity linked to it would make them focus more on me than on the messages. I don't care about recognition, at least not at this point. I want what I create to be effective and moving.

What I want to talk to people deeply about: Some combination of what I mentioned above I suppose. This has been a challenge for me, I suppose I'm still refining and figuring that out. I often don't like talking to others about these things because they lack the depth I'm seeking/feeling. I think there's a lot of useful and relevant stuff buried in these ancient texts that I seem to have the ability to sift through and synthesize and embody/use, I guess I'd like to share that somehow. I'd like to open things up and re-introduce a sense of wonder and awe and appreciation and questioning and mystery to the lives of others. I'd like to be able to articulate these things in coherent ways.