Wow. I don't really know what to say. That's a lot of words, and I read most of it, but damn.

I'm not "progressive", because I don't believe that society as a whole has any goal to "progress" towards. I think we're making it up as we go along. So being frustrated that people don't conform to your idea of progress is about as productive as slamming your head into a wall.

I'm a white, male atheist in my late twenties. So I'm basically the person you're directing this post to. I'll try to respond in an organized manner.

Language:

I don't use, or care about any of the terms that you use to describe people: "cis", "xe", "xir" etc. People are a spectrum, mentally and emotionally. Trans, bi, pan, straight, gay, whatever we call each other, we're just creating artificial divisions on a line. Although it's more like a big ball of wibbl-y wobbl-y mind-y wind-y stuff than a line.

So I don't give a shit.

I expect people to grow the fuck up. If I refer to them as a man because they look like a man to me, then you can consider that my best guess as to your gender. If you're not a man, then say so- I promise it will barely cause a hiccup in the conversation, and from that point on I will refer to you as whatever you want to be referred too.

We're probably not that far out (historically) from being able to artificially manipulate our bodies to such an extent that biological sex (as well as skin color) will become a "whatever I feel like being this morning" decision instead of a rigid category. If that happens while I'm still alive, I'll have to get used to describing people as what they've done, rather than what their body looks like.

Atheism:

I've come to terms with the fact that most of the people who are the most virulent atheists on the internet are basically where I was in the first few years after I lost my religious beliefs. They're pissed off about being lied too, pissed off that they're in a minority just because they critically examined their beliefs, enraged at the condescending, "you're a bad person" view of religious people (by which many of them are surrounded), and ready to take their emotional pain and anguish out on anyone who happens to be nearby.

I did this. For almost two years. Then I developed my new, "Fuck you" philosophy. If you disagree with me, and you can't explain (in a semi-logical, point by point manner) why I'm wrong, and you condescend:

Fuck you.

If you want to really talk, I'll answer your questions until I have something else to do.

So take everything the Reddit Atheist Army says with a little bit of skepticism. Most of them are hurt, angry newcomers who have just explored the outer limits of their families love. I cut them extra slack because losing your religion is a terrible, painful experience.

Insensitive Cursing:

I curse. Like a sailor. I stand by cursing. It is an excellent and time honored method of explaining how you feel about a situation. I curse in real life as well as online. I curse in my personal writing, which no one except me will ever, ever read.

Words like "nigger", "cunt", "bitch" and "faggot" very rarely make it into my vocabulary of expletives, except when I'm explaining, for example, the word "nigger" in a secondary way.

I go out of my way, and override my own personal inclination/indoctrination, to use the full word in a sentence if I'm describing it's use. I will never say "the n-word" or the "c-word", in an actual conversation. This is because I believe that words are just words, and they don't have any magical properties.

The reason why they don't make it into my actual "I am trying to offend you" cursing, is because they're discriminatory. I like big, inclusive offensive words, because I'm an equal opportunity asshole. If I'm cursing at someone, I want them to know that I hate them personally, and not because of the color of their skin, or the shape of their genitals.

But in a more general way, excluding those particular words from my vocabulary is a way of respecting the fact that real, violent discrimination was perpetuated against a particular subset of the population, and those words were used as a rallying cry for that violent discrimination.

Having said that, I support the right of every other person on the planet to come to the same conclusion that I have, freely. I'm not going to protest their usage of a word, because words are just words, and as adults, we should be able to say what we like, even when it's wrong.

Also as adults, we should be able to understand that when someone is using race or gender/sex based insults against us, they probably aren't susceptible to rational discussion. Then you leave. Alternately, you can escalate, which can be satisfying at times.

Triggers:

I think triggers are bullshit. I've been through an extensive list of emotionally traumatizing experiences, including but not limited to:

• A war in which I was deeply involved in combat for a long time.

• Expulsion from my parents home, twice.

• Death of loved ones.

And depending on how minuscule you want to go, probably a hundred other small traumas.

Due to my experiences in Afghanistan, I can't watch a lot of war films, I've left a building because I caught the crawling shakes from an abandoned backpack, I drive slowly and sometimes I still watch the side of the road for wires/disturbed soil/buckets. And at times, for no reason at all, as I'm going to sleep, my mind perks up and says "whatdoyasay we review some old memories?" and I stop being able to sleep.

Aside: I'm not trying to play the vet-trauma-trump-card here, if you (for some reason) feel that I'm bullshitting, say what you want. I don't give a fuck.

I don't expect anyone to make special allowances for me, because most people don't have issues with the things I have issues with. It's irrational to expect, with the wide range of trauma that human beings can be put through, and the truly awe-inspiring array of quirks and foibles that we have, that everyone make allowance for every possible negative reaction to their content.

I don't expect a burger joint to censor their menu in case a customer had a burger-related trauma, just like I don't expect them to provide for every possible type of disabled person. They cater to the most common disabilities, and if someone comes in who has trouble, they will either figure out a way to order and eat themselves (because human beings are crazy-adaptable) or you help them out.

Conclusion/Real Liberals:

So, to try to wrap this up, because I need to go do real life things.

Your simplistic model in which conservatives are on one side, and liberals are on the other, is just that. A simplistic model. I'm liberal, but I can guarantee you that I:

A: have beliefs that align at least partially with the far right.

B: have beliefs that are so far "left" that they don't even fit into the current political conversation.

There are no "real liberals" there are people who hold opinions that can partially, or even mostly be described as liberal (as "liberal" is understood in the current climate). But being offended that someone holds "non-liberal" beliefs, is like a black guy being offended that another black guy is an atheist. The color of a person's skin has fuck-all to do with their religious beliefs.

And the label a person falls under due to some of their opinions doesn't mean that the label is indicative of all of their other opinions.

I think that marriage should be a contract between two or more sentient, consenting and reasonably experienced creatures. That definition would give some liberals the creepy-crawlies.

So, to conclude here. I'm tired, and I have things to do. I hope that this long-ass post clarified a few things about the people (white-male-atheist-psuedoliberals) that you're referring to in yours. But if it doesn't, maybe someone will get a kick out of it.

Later.

TL:DR I said a lot of stuff.