I am flummoxed about this one: A young girl (21) that I've mentored in her career for the past four years is getting "married" in three weeks. I was pretty happy for her. She really wanted to security of a marriage I guessed. Well, her fiancee is a friend of our family and he told me that although there is this big wedding, they never got a marriage license, there will be therefore no "officiant", and yet...they are performing their own "marriage ceremony" because "who needs a piece of paper to say they are married"? Well, ME for one I told him but I didn't elaborate. I am not a conservative person but on this issue I feel really strongly that this is not in the best interest of my young friend or the guests for that matter (presents of money, gifts, etc). Her fiancee is pretty hipster but all that aside I wonder if she knows this is not legal? Is this "illegal" to ruse a marriage with the state? I would feel like an awful person to ask her if she understands this because if she does it will certainly bring her some amount of shaming from me. I just don't want to witness this lie in front of their families or friends. From what he told me, no one knows.