Siblings of Sociopaths or Narcissists, when did you realize your sibling wasn't normal?

Not sure where to start, I come from a long line of mentally fucked people. My earliest and only memory of my grandmother is when she told everyone in the family that she had cancer and not long to live, when everyone showed up to give her support she killed herself. Turns out she was perfectly healthy for an old gal. My mother is not much better, I cannot trust a single thing she says. Lied to me all of my life, attempting to turn me against both my immediate and extended family. These relationships I still struggle with to this day, as its hard for me to let anyone in, even after therapy. Everything has to be about her, and only her, and if it wasn't she would lie, cheat, make a scene, anything really to get the focus she so craved. She also has a lovely choice in men, all addicts or abusive, in which she produced 6 fucked up offspring with from 4 different fathers. These men are grade A people in my book, between the physical and mental abuse, and the drugs they got my siblings and I hooked on it's really a wonder that only one of my brothers turned out to be psychotic.

But he is about as psychotic as they come, I am the third born and the one I am referring to was born second. I knew he had serious issues early, he used to piss the bed on purpose. Just so our mother would have to clean it up and to shame her when visiting places or staying someplace new. I know this because he told me so, laughing about it. He stole a pellet gun from the local hardware store when he was around 7. I found him at the park, laughing his ass off hiding under a bench, it didn't take me long to figure out what he found so funny. He had also stole bird seed and poured it into a pile, when the birds would land to eat he would shoot them. But that wasn't the worst of it, he would crawl out from his position to prop the dead bird up so it appeared that it was still eating to help attract more birds. There had to be at least 20 of his "trophies" around that pile. Later in life he killed my sisters dog with an ax, just because it bit him.

He turned to violence instantly and with no reason, usually against me. He knew I did not like to fight back, not because I was scared of actually fighting, but because I knew it would only escalate the situation. That was until the day he hit my defenseless sister, and when my mom tried to intervene hit her with a closet dowel and knocked her out. I proceeded to beat the living fuck out of him, long after he was convulsing on the floor chocking on his own blood from his tore up tongue. The only reason I stopped is my eldest brother pulled me off of him, this was one of the few times in my life I lost my shit, but to this day I wish my brother never pulled me away.

Soon after that he went to go live with his father, who in fact was not his father at all, my mother lied to him about that. It was actually my father, she didn't want him to know his real one. He didn't change his ways, tried to get into altercations with my father which did not end well for my brother. After 3 months my dad had all the shit he could handle told him the truth of his parentage and kicked him out. Within the week he set my fathers house on fire while he was asleep.

I didn't hear a single peep about him for about 10 years after this, until one day he shows up on my moms porch with a mail order bride (not married yet) pregnant with his kid. During this visit I saw him doing meth in my moms kitchen, and told him to get the fuck out, fists started flying and he ended up a bloody pile on the floor partly thanks to my eldest brothers help. Cops were called and he was dragged away. While locked up for the drug conviction he, not sure how exactly, had his girlfriend who was still carrying his kid deported.

A few years go by, now in modern times, he shows up at my house. How he found me I have no idea, but was asking for a place to stay because he didn't like it at the halfway house he had apparently been staying at. I kicked his ass to the curb with a swiftness, I did not even let him see the inside of my home. So after asking all my other relatives in which he burnt every bridge he could of ever had and all refused he decided he would rather be homeless than get clean. Problem was is he never registered as a sex offender, which was something no one knew about, and never would have found out if not for a stupid game a couple of my coworkers and I play when passing time. Where we look at the intake list of the nearest jail and guess the crime they did based only on their name. I happened to see his name and later when alone looked at his crime. Tracked down all the information about it with the court documents I had to pay a pretty penny for. I wont say exactly what he did, but I wish I would have killed him when I had the chance.

I could go on and on about him, but it's depressing as fuck, although its good to vent about from time to time as these are the kind of things I hide from just about everyone I know and for good reason.

/r/AskReddit Thread