Single for 3.5 years & jaded. I’m aware we’re all affected by the covid, but I felt like even before 2020 dating was never fun for me anymore. I use career and hobbies to distract myself from disappointment.

If finding a relationship with a simple task, what value would the thing bring to your life? We can't really fully understand the ways a relationship brings happiness unless balanced by the awareness of its sad & shitty absence -- so dig into the darkness, but don't lose faith in the goal.

In my mind, the danger is that you are on the cusp of losing that faith. If the only way to potentiate something in life is to hold on the the thing you want, then you have to accept: there is always someone else if you are looking. Focus on the practicalities and logistics of your goal -- hold it in an actionable place like you have always held things. If the men in your area are duds, where aren't they duds? Go on a trip alone, volunteer in a different city or abroad, look for a language partner -- if you have an interest, the benefit is that all of these can be generative in ways other than romance and can lead toward a wholeness and stronger connection with the Self.

Keep focusing on creating an inner condition that gives inner happiness -- no abundance of external things will totally do the trick. The people I really want to be around and foster relationships with are ones that have conditioned this inner happiness and are self-loving. Continue striving toward this and never make exceptions on the things that are important to you, like the values you list. BAAABE, look, you have a lot going for you (you're a fucking a swan among ducklings). So, hold on to your goals with patience and equanimity and life might surprise you.

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