Why do some people say that sex is not important to them or to a relationship, but at the same time they don't want their partners to have sex with other people?

Yes, I understand that if you feel your partner doesn’t value you at all, you might want to leave. Absolutely. And if an open relationship ship works for you great.

Rape culture doesn’t exactly mean a culture of people who rape. It means a culture of people who make rape harder to prosecute, harder to come forward about, and harder to stop. “What was she wearing?” “How much did they drink?” “They were flirting all night” “they’re married” are all things people say to excuse rape.

I see this from the people who think someone refusing sex is cruel. Point blank, the simple act of saying no is not cruel. Neither is not wanting to have sex but still not wanting your partner to find it elsewhere. That is human nature. If you are not getting enough out of your relationship, you can leave. Of course using sex as a manipulation tool is cruel. But saying no because you do not want to, is not. And the people who think it is are contributing to rape culture.

/r/DeadBedrooms Thread Parent