Ultimately, I think shaming or banning female sexuality is another form of controlling women.

I agree.

However, I think you should ask yourself if this control of female sexuality is right

And this is where I'm confused. I don't know if its right, but I'm not convinced its wrong either.

Sex is an important part of our existence after all. Society cannot function if large numbers of physically larger, hornier and generally more aggressive members are sexually frustrated. They will eventually lash out, and only other men will be able to stop them.

women by their nature have a sexual advantage (an assumption that I would actually argue with in and of itself)

Why wouldn't the ability to qualify mates be an advantage?

by trapping them in complicated societal norms that penalize them for their natural behaviors.

This is actually the most fascinating part of human culture IMO.

People all over the planet appear to have come to the same conclusion, i.e. control female sexuality and impose monogamy. Entire religions and cultures were built around this idea.

If pre-marital relations are seen as a huge no-no in society...by trapping them in complicated societal norms that penalize them for their natural behaviors.

I'm not sure if saving yourself for marriage is necessarily the same as oppressing women.

If every woman saved herself, wouldn't all the guys wind up "saving" themselves for marriage too?

Actually, I wonder why the opposite never happened. Why weren't men forced to save themselves for marriage? because the net result would've been the same, right?

then by taking away that sexual advantage

It sounds like feminism is primarily concerned with maximizing female sexual options, irrespective of the effect it'd have on male sexuality, the "traditional" family unit or social harmony.

Has anyone done any research on what effect this would have on society?