Don’t make the assumption that your kid is ‘better off with two parents’. No, but they're better off with a good, competent parent there all the time.

Turns out that I thought my ex was a good dad, but what he was really doing was following my lead. And now that you are not there to lead, it's worse for your son. That's what you said, right?

I'm honestly a bit baffled by your post. You talk about how you are the better parent (and it def seems so!) So how is your son BETTER off without you there?

I'm not saying you should have stayed - not at all! I'm just saying it really sounds like you said your son is worse off not having you around every day... but yet the divorce was better for him. Seems you're contradicting yourself.

I wouldn’t have the emotional or mental energy to be there for my child, Very unlikely. You sound like the type of person who has her shit together. If he needed you, you'd suck it up & do what needed to be done.

don’t make the assumption that your kids don’t know what’s going on. What's going on is prioritizing the family. Yeah, parents shouldn't stay together if they loathe one another & can't be civil & cooperative. But if they CAN, but they just lack love & physical affection, I don't see that as necessarily a detrimental environment for kids.

It's a shitty situation either way & there isn't one right answer.