lots of posts ... "Please understand it's for safety reasons that I don't want to go to your house / a solitary area after dark for the first date."

Do you mean posts in which they ask men in general to understand - or specific real life people they have said this to?

I can see some utility in the former but yeah agreed on the latter.

Men don't need to understand why you have boundaries.

Understanding does convey the 'level' of boundary though. Elevate it from a minor one like "I don't like spicy food" and they're trying to get you to try a mild dish to a major one like "I don't like doing parkour off of skyscrapers" and they're trying to get you to jump a 6 foot gap between high rises.

Whether that's a good thing though I can't say. It means more boundaries will be respected but it also means the loss of an easy to catch red flag.