[Stories] What's your best "I've messed with the wrong person" moment?

In middle school a kid about my size used to body check me into a locker whenever he saw me. I'd been in so many fights by middle school, I couldn't afford another ruckus, I'd get suspended like forever and have to repeat a grade or spend another year in the special ed room. Kids are nice in special ed, but I didn't want to serve another year eating lunch at my desk in there. My dad was a railroader, so we moved a lot. I had to take this kid crashing into me every day when he'd see me, and that's how it was.

One day he caught me alone on the bottom floor of the school. Nobody around. Crazy look in his eyes. Yeah, I'm going to be ran into a locker, and its going to hurt. Well, one thing he doesn't know. I'm a railroader's son. I waited for the body check, then tossed him against a locker face first, and proceeded to beat him. Well, attempted. He's a cop's son and knows Judo or something, I can't recall. Hit me in the face three times in about a second, and maybe kicked me too. Also, he wasn't getting tired like the bigger kids I usually fought. This might be the worst fight I've ever been in, usually there's no skill involved, and usually the other guy isn't punching my face like a speed bag and ducking my punches like fucking bruce lee. I put my hands on his throat. Last ditch, you choke them until they lose their ability to fight, lay em down, sit on their chest, and beat their faces in. Yeah, I've done this before. Looks like I'm being home schooled. Again.

Didn't go as planned. He put his thumbs in my eyes. Thats the moment I decided this fight might not be worth it. Not the part where I got my face beaten in, the part where he poked me in both eyeballs. But his arms weren't long enough to push his thumbs in any further than barely touching. I put him down, then got a few licks in, only to be caught by the art teacher before I could do something really terrible. On the upside, I got zero punishment. As in, zero, nothing, they didn't call my mom, didn't suspend me, it was like it never happened at all. I think this kid being a douche got me a pass. He never even looked in my direction again. I think his old man encouraged him to chill.

Kid was totally not bigger than me, right about my size I think, I'd been in dozens of fights with bigger kids, but I'd never guess this little bastard was dangerous.

/r/AskReddit Thread