Stuck in my own head!

There isn't a ton to tell...

I am a 30-year-old, divorced (with shared custody of small child), business exec who signed up for online dating after a year of being single for the sole purpose of FWB until I worked through a few of my own issues caused by a nasty divorce. Did the whole FWB thing for about another year and a half, decided I was probably to remain single for the rest of my life. Planned for it, actually. Envisioned a future with just my daughter and I.

I met an INTJ man. Chatted for a few weeks, met for a date, took things slow as fuck. Decided I was going to slowly see where this was going to take me. He sat me down and had the "where are we going" talk about 4 months later, because he wanted to go in the direction of a relationship, and I appeared disinterested in one. I agreed to speed things up, and try to treat our dating a little more seriously. Now 5 months after that, it seems as if I'm in a real relationship, he has met my child, and he makes me very happy.

Here is where is gets tricky for me...

1) I don't want my child to get too attached if it's going to end in heartbreak for her. Sure, he says that he is all in, he loves me, and this is as serious as it gets for him, but I think for the time being I will continue to date the guy without having him partake in any family time on the days I spend with my daughter. Maybe we will revisit if we take further steps in the future.

2) I'm having a harder time than I initially thought, having another person in my life. He would never impede on my goals or life, but in some ways, having just another body around slows me down, and I just recently voiced my frustration with that. Otherwise, we get along really well, and I could be very happy seeing him every day if that were to eventually happen. I just know that I have a couple huge goals I had set out for myself, and I don't know how to integrate another person in my life at the same time.

Tl;dr: Busy, independent, single mom and business exec who is probably a little gun shy, trying to protect self and child, and don't know how to integrate another person into my life without slowing down. I think.

/r/entj Thread Parent