Taxi drivers of reddit, what is your best taxi story?

A taxi drives into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, we don't allow taxis in here." And so the taxi left without a drink.

The next night, he comes back with a new paint job, making him look like just a regular old sedan. The bartender looks him up and down and says "We don't allow sedans in here either." And so the taxi left without a drink.

The next night he comes back again, but after getting a pickup truck bed surgically attached to him. The bartended looks at him again and says "We don't allow any cars at all in this establishment." And so the taxi left without a drink.

The next day he decides to get his body scrapped of almost all its parts, leaving only a poorly constructed bicycle. He wanted to get into that bar, no matter what it took, even if it meant losing all the parts that made him truly him.

And so he went to drive to the bar, but he realized that without a motor, he could not move. And with no legs, he could not pedal. And with no alcohol in his system, he would suffer withdrawal symptoms.

After two weeks, he was finally free from addiction. Though still, he could not move. He lay there sadly on the floor of that vacant garage, until the Earth was destroyed by the sun millions of years later.

Moral of the story: Don't try to answer a question about being a taxi driver if you're just some stoned college kid who forgot why he started writing this in the first place.

/r/AskReddit Thread