She types her notes while she talks to me which is a bit annoying especially because it’s on zoom.
The new one didn’t even want to hear about [me and my life]. She kept focusing on what my therapy goal was and what I needed to accomplish. She was very big on getting a therapy plan in place.
This is not therapy. This is a shitty and disrespectful life coaching session... if that.
In both of my therapies I would have HATED it if my therapist typed up notes during session (different from writing notes down with a pen!). It would have been an absolute deal breaker if the therapist had refused to allow me the room to set my own agenda and go at my own pace in the therapy room. Different strokes for different folks, of course, but IMO the therapy space is sacred because it is YOUR space. A therapist who imposes their own agenda on you, by directing you to identify your goals and forcing you to set a plan in the very first session? That is a therapist who has no respect for your space in the therapy room. It would be a huge red flag for me if that were to happen.
The first session should be about building rapport and trying to understand each other. And instead she's rushing to put you in a box, barely even waiting to see if you want to be in that box. Every cell in my body is screaming: RUN!! This is not okay. This is not what therapy should look like, not even pure behaviorists act this way in the therapy room, so being a CBT therapist is no excuse either. She completely neglected the "C" in CBT, and worse, mention she forgot all about the therapeutic relationship, a cornerstone of CBT (and every other modality that hopes to work).
It kind of rubbed me wrong and made me more upset than I was when I entered the call.
This is all you need to know to tell her thank you for the session, it's not a good fit so you will not be returning to see her. The therapy simply won't work if you don't have a good initial alliance with your therapist immediately. Lots of studies have shown that the therapy experience is significantly less effective for people who kept working with a therapist that they disliked after the first session.
Your gut is your biggest asset in judging whether a therapist is right for you. The only exception is if you're literally looking for straight-up Freudian psychoanalysis, lying on the couch three to five times a week for five to ten years at a time: some psychoanalysts believe that an initial negative transference is not a barrier to a good analysis. But that's not you. You're looking for therapy, not analysis. Please don't return to this person. Find someone else.