Thin people of reddit, what are some examples of "skinny shaming" you have experienced?

My family thinks it's appropriate to make holocaust jokes about my weight. Espcially when I relapse into my eating disorder. I find this upsetting on so many levels. I don't know if I can count all the ways at the moment.

I'm only a "real woman" when I put weight on. That status is not stable. I lose it when I lose weight. Whether or not I'm considered a woman boils down to whether or not I can manage a major depressive episode. But what am I in the mean time? No one can answer me that? Still a person, I hope.

I've been told that women with eating disorders cannot be feminists. This is why we need intersectionality in feminism. I'm not out to shame normal weighted and heavy women. I have a fucking mental illness that I struggle with. It has way more to do with an anxiety disorder than it does women's magazines. I'm not out to get anyone, shame anyone for their size. What I really want in life is to be left alone. I can have a mental illness and be a feminist. Feminism isn't just for the healthy.

Anyone who as known me 10+ years hugs me slowly, tentatively, carefully and gently as though I'm made of glass. I know that it's more than just affection. They are thinking about when I was thinner; too thin for their comfort. They feel for muscle and fat now. If I'm not big enough to put their minds at ease, they will tell me. Even though it's done out of worry rather than overt shaming, I still feel just as shitty. I can't outlive my past. No matter how much time passes, no one will let me. "Dancingsilverfish, remember when you could have died?" Yes, all too well, all too well. But I'm healthy now and have been for a good long while.

I have a chronic pain condition. People who don't know me well are inclined to think that I'm either lazy or a liar (which is almost preferable than to have people take my health problems too seriously) because upon the surface, I appear quite fit and healthy.

What I eat (or more accurately, don't eat) is scrutinized by a lot of people.

When my clothes are lying around (like at the beach or camping) and someone who isn't close to me picks them up, I'll get an earful about being an adult who wears children's clothing. When I start finding more affordable adult clothing in my size that I don't have to take in, I'll fucking wear it. I have Anthropoligie tastes on a K-Mart clearance budget.

Any interest in fitness is suspicious to people who don't know me well. There are many reasons one would want to live an active lifestyle and I've worked my fucking ass off to grow beyond the point of wanting one just to burn calories. I exercise to manage pain, I exercise for strength and energy, I exercise to age gracefully.

I've heard lots of "real men love curves, only dogs love bones". Heaven forbid a man should be attracted to more than just one body type, that a man should love me for the merits of my character, a life we have built together or the things I accomplish.... no. My worth is boiled down to a hip to waist ratio (which is too stick-like). Let me go tell my husband that his affection for me is invalid since I can't shove my tits close enough to form sufficient cleavage. He'll see the error of his ways and dump this bag of bones he's married to.

/r/AskReddit Thread