The thing most men seem to want on dating apps: 'not something serious but also not something casual'

I'm in a FWB relationship right now (not sure how to define it since we're not really friends, but we're more than hookups) where neither one of us want anything more serious. I'm not even sure we particularly like each other, which is probably why we keep seeing each other. We certainly don't really connect on an emotional level. To be honest, our interaction is just weird in an awkward way lol Maybe that's why we keep seeing each other.

Neither of us wants to accidentally fall in love, or for the other to fall for us. He's still hung up on his ex (literally got drunk one night and cried in my arms over her). I just went through a divorce after a 33 year marriage to a serial cheater and have zero interest in falling in love again, so I don't care that he's still in love with his ex. Yet we meet up, hang out, occasionally go to dinner or art shows or we're going to a concert together this weekend, have sex, and cuddle and watch movies.

Why, if we don't even particularly like each other? Loneliness and need for sex and straight up just need for the touch of another human. The fact that we don't particularly like each other means we're safe to date each other without falling for each other. "Not like each other" probably isn't the right description. I guess in normal circumstances we would never be drawn to each other. He's a heavily pierced and tattooed biker recovering alcoholic who used to be very wild and is still planning to go to Sturgis this summer, and I'm a quiet introverted scientist without a single tattoo and only ears pierced once, rarely drink and never done drugs etc. Our personalities are so different you would never expect us to be together. And while we would never really want a real relationship together, we do find comfort in each other during the turmoiled transitions we're going through in our lives right now.

Again, I absolutely don't want to fall in love, so seeing him is safe because he's not someone I would ever fall for. I get my needs taken care of without worries of "catching feelings". I'm guessing a lot of the men you're talking about are in the same situation of wanting their needs met without wanting the emotional attachment, but that's hard to define to someone else and it's hard to find someone of the same mindset

/r/dating Thread