not my stories, but these are 2 of my mom's stories

She had a patient who had been drinking, smoking, snorting, everything. He came in complaining of extreme abdominal pain. He was septic and in serious condition. They did an xray and saw a mass in his intestines. They went into surgery to get what was in there out. It was a gerbil. A full grown gerbil. Apparently the name of the game was to get the tubes gerbils use to crawl around their cage in, and put it in your butt and let the gerbil crawl through and it was supposed to crawl back out. This gerbil got stuck and died. It was already in decomposition, leading the patient to have a terrible gastric infection and become septic. So if my mom ever tells you you smell like something crawled up inside you and died, there's a problem. Because she knows exactly what that smells like.

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The second story is much more sad and if car crashes or gory detail trigger you, do not read ahead.

My mom was probably late 20's, just beginning her life as a nurse and all the other young nurses around her would go and party most every night after work. One of the nurses invited her out. My mother politely declined, as she had a kid at home to take care of. The same co worker kept complaining that if she doesn't get to go out, she's gonna die. The next day, the hospital gets a call about a car crash victim ejected from the car. It was the same co worker that asked her to go out the night before. The girl's leg got stuck between the seat and the door, and when she was ejected, her leg was left behind. Her leg was stuck in the car and the rest of her body went through the window. She bled out before the ambulance even got there. To this day, when my mom thinks about it, she can still hear the girl's voice saying, "I'm just gonna die if I don't get to go out tonight!" And due to too much drinking and deciding to drive, she lost everything. She left behind 2 girls and a husband.