3. She threw Away my Mod/Atomizer/juice/Batteries/Charger because she refuses to un...

She threw Away my Mod/Atomizer/juice/Batteries/Charger because she refuses to understand that vaping != smoking cigarettes :(

Thank you for the comment, it's nice to hear from someone who understands what I've been going through. I'm going to comment this and then essentially delete it right away. I've deleted the post and all the other comments I've made on it due to it turning into kind of a shitshow with the "junkies deserve to die" crowd spamming it and my private messages. But I wanted to respond back to you because of the kind words you've left me :).

Anyway. Like I said it's nice to hear from someone who's been where I am now. Congratulations to you on overcoming your addiction to your prescription versions of H, I'm always so happy to hear when people have beat their addiction!!! My mom is slowly coming around and understanding that vaping helps me keep my mind off wanting other vices and, as messed up as it is, getting to vape and feel that nicotine release those sweet sweet chemicals in my brain allows me to trick myself into feeling like I'm getting fucked up so it takes care of that fiending too. I think she's seeing that it's really truly helping me to vape, and that yes, it is an addiction, but it is something that is helping me beat my worse addiction, and that gives it merit. I really think her throwing it all out was just a knee-jerk reaction to her being upset and scared (which she absolutely had a right to feel), and wouldn't be something she would normally do.

I'm aware that relapses are something to be expected when fighting the fight I am. Not that they should be celebrated or that it gives me an excuse for my actions, because in NO WAY does anything excuse what I did, but, it's not something that is completely shocking if you know anything about addiction. If you know what I mean? I know I will never be cured. This will always be something I struggle with, for the rest of my life. When I have things go wrong in my life, it will make me want to use again, which is exactly the time when I should not use. I just have to be vigilant (CONSTANT VIGILANCE Mad-Eye Moody anyone? Lol) and find positive ways to deal with my emotions and ways to channel my feelings into positive actions. I'm trying to explain things like this to my parents. My parents, to their credit, have been doing lots and lots of reading and researching to better understand what I am going through and I am honestly impressed with their knowledge lol. I'm doing my best to stay clean. Everyone has lost someone to this disease, as awful as that is. I'm sorry to hear that some of the people you've lost are due to the way people have treated their recovery, I can't even begin to understand how terrible that must feel. I appreciate all that you've said here man. I'll continue to fight because that's something that really matters to me and I want my life to be full of so much more than hitting up dboys and waiting for them in parking lots for hours and getting well (not high, not possible for me anymore, but getting well) and feeling the clock start over again and trying to hustle up enough money to make it to the next day...I deserve to have a life that I can be proud of and that makes me happy when I think about it <3

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