sighs heavily

Alright, this may come off bad. Hopefully I explain this right, but I know someone is going to misunderstand this.

My ex would walk around without a top on and in her thong. In her case though, she knew this would arouse me, and did directly tell me she enjoyed teasing me.

The obvious problem here is the consent part. If he couldn't tell by your body language that you weren't feeling it, then either he is daft or you need to work on body communication. And NO, I'm not blaming you before that reads bad. Since I obviously wasn't there, I don't know how you responded. I'm ASSUMING you communicated in some way you didn't want it, even by subconsciously shrugging him off or something.

With my ex, I honestly never got verbal consent past our first time. She was very physically responsive, and you could kind of tell when she was feeling it. Like, if I'm running my hands down your body and you spread your legs wide, I don't need a written invitation to figure out where you'd like my hands to go next.

So provided you absolutely communicated you did not want this, then he is an ass for proceeding anyway.

I do have a question for you though, because it is a bit confusing. I'm not entirely sure I understand this story. You sound like you're saying you wanted to feel sexy (which to me means you wanted to be sexually attractive to others at the time). Yet, you were trying to do homework? Here comes the confusing bit. If you're trying to be sexy around your ex, I don't understand why you'd expect him to not look at you sexually at the moment? I'm not trying to be mean or calloused, I genuinely don't see why you'd want to be sexy around someone you didn't want to treat you sexually. It's not like a bar, where there are people you're trying to attract and then some other people you aren't. It's your private space, who else is there but you and him?

I'm asking this because initially I was thinking "Yeah, non-sexual nudity isn't automatically an invitation", but you threw me off by talking about being "sexy", which I kind of do take as an invitation.

Going back to my ex, if she was wearing something provocative, she made sure I was watching. So I absolutely took every chance I could to touch her, and she loved it (verbal, again). However, I wouldn't have found this out without trying first. I mean, she could have just been leaning over the counter in a thong that first time, not meaning to attract me. She could have just been slowly moving her rump at me. But it honestly just seemed very unlikely at the time.

So if I could get some clarification on that, that'd be great. Because I'm honestly confused about how walking around trying to be sexy while topless would not be seen as sexually inviting. And yes, that goes both ways. If I didn't want my ex to try coming on to me, I covered up. Never really worked of course, but I still covered up. She was mildly aggressive like that.