This TIFU happened about an hour ago, and I have to say is probably one of my greatest fears.
I was in the area of my friends house due to some errands I was running and was probably 30 minutes from my house. My friend happens to also sell me weed, so my plan was to stop by after my business was concluded to pick up some. Now this is a friend I have had for years, and hadn't actually been over to his house in a few months.
About 15 minutes before I get there, I am struck with the immediate sensation of hot lava shit dropping chambers in my intestines. At first I thought maybe I could endure until I got home, as I don't like pooping in public or places I'm not comfortable. The tide soon turns however as the the pressure builds and I realize there's no way I will make it the probably 45 minutes until I am home. I wasn't too worried however since my friend lives in a house by himself and I figured I would just tell him about the shitastrophe building in my pants.
When I get there the first thing I notice is an unknown car in his driveway, odd but okay maybe someone else stopped by no big deal they were probably picking up as well and would be gone soon. Halfway to the door I realize that my friend told me about a month ago that his sister was living with him for a while, I also have never met her. I think to myself not to worry, maybe shes in her room keeping to herself.
I walk in to find him and his sister in the living room, she seems very friendly and we talk for a moment as I realize there's no going back now and my time has run out. I ask to use the bathroom real quick and head there down the hall. Okay no problem I think, I will just squeeze a quick poo out and no one will be the wiser.
The first problem I run into is that the vent fan was broken, meaning whatever foul smells I conjured would be trapped in there for who knows how long. I sit down and as quietly as possible try to unleash the fury. At first I was able to keep the volume down and thought I might be able to finish up relatively quick. It was then I noticed I could hear EVERYTHING they were saying in the living room. The television was on but the volume was very low, and I remember being angry that the volume wasn't higher.
It was then that the battle turned for the worst, as the flow increased and I lost all control. The fart shit storm had arrived and there is no doubt the sound and probably smell was reaching the living room that was ten feet away. After the 15 minute battle that resulted in 2 flushes, a pulverized anus, and a lot of shame;I wobbled into the living room trying to hide my limp from a burning butthole.
They were sitting in the living room quietly, probably unsure how to proceed from the horrors I brought them. I made some excuse about getting food poisoning from tacos and concluded my business as fast as possible. She didn't look at me the rest of the time I was there and my buddy told me when he walked me out that was her bathroom while she was staying here.