Tired of Feeling Like a Victim all the Damn Time.

I have very complicated feelings on this issue. I was married to a very unkind man for 10 years. When I tell people about it I say that I don't want any pity or anything because I chose to stay and allowed myself to be treated badly year after year. People insist I'm wrong. That it was totally his fault, that I share no responsibility.

But it's important to be to claim some of it. It's important to me to feel like I can learn from it, understand my own choices, and thereby have better control over them in the future. It does feel somewhat empowering.

Of course the truth lies somewhere in the middle. I bear responsibility for allowing it, and he bears responsibility for perpetrating it. Unlike biological sex, the rest of life usually isn't binary.

/r/GenderCritical Thread