The point of the "give them a year" thing is, neither of those things tend to happen. I've been in the exact same situation as you - my boyfriend (Goat)'s sister was screaming that he was being taken advantage of and that she wouldn't let "those people" anywhere near her kids. Six months later I was at her daughter's christening. My mother said me and Pig would break up within the year and refused to hear about, let alone meet, any of my other partners. Three years later we're planning our wedding and my Mum is wanting to know when me and Goat - who she has over for dinner in alternating weeks with Pig - are getting married too.

I don't want to minimise what you're going through - it SUCKS. It made me cry. It made me freak out and wonder if it was all worth it. In the end, though, your family will see the love you and your partner/s are feeling for one another, the way your voice changes when you talk about them, etc. All of this in small doses over months and months.

After a year, if they're reasonable at all, your family will be really fond of your partner and 'tolerant' of your lifestyle. If within a year they haven't come to this "awakening", they may never, and at that point it's up to you to stop putting the effort in. You aren't cutting them off - you're just not going to keep coming over for dinner every month if they spend that dinner begging you to break up with your partner. Let them reach out to you, and leave events when they start being hateful.

Again, I know it must seem like the mere thought of your Dad being OK with your partner in as little as a few months is a completely ridiculous notion, but believe me and the others who are posting here. We've all been there. Families tend to mellow out when they realise the imminent breakup hasn't happened yet.

Now, that's not to say everything's perfect - Goat's parents, for example, still say I'm perfect "except for that one thing", but they don't overtly whine about it anymore, and most importantly I feel loved and respected when I'm around them, whereas the first time I met his mother I felt like I was a space alien who she was judging/gawking at.