Tomorrow I have an intake appointment at a domestic violence shelter. AMA.

Oh I should be clear that I'm not moving in yet. I'm doing a two hour interview and registering as a consumer of their services. I plan on maybe going to a support group and talking to a counselor about my options if I ever plan on leaving. The biggest concern I have is my financial well being because I have begun to suspect that the business he has registered in my name is engaging in illicit activity. Also I think I might be in debt that he is hiding from me.

What's happening in your life?

My husband has always been emotionally and psychologically abusive with a scattering of physical abuse as well. A few months ago he threatened to kill me and I contacted the national domestic violence hotline (which my psychiatrist has been trying to get me to do) and they told me that the type physical violence he inflicts on me (sitting on top of me and choking me, sitting on my head for hours, etc.) can be lethal. It took me years to get to the point where I started to think that maybe he is abusive, and this is just the next step in slowly preparing to maybe get out some day.

Do you have children you're taking?

I do not have children.

What is making you most nervous?

Mostly that I'm not the type of woman that the shelter is designed to help. I'm sure they deal with cases that are much more severe than mine. I am white, I am educated, I have a job, albeit a low paying one. I'm not the woman you would see on the street and think "she has a rough life" or anything like that. I also have PTSD from childhood sexual abuse by my father and bipolar disorder and an on again off again eating disorder and am in recovery from substance abuse. I just expect them to take one look at me and think "you don't belong here".

/r/casualiama Thread Parent