It’s kinda sad I feel kinda shitty that looks matter so much to us

Looks are a shockingly predictive heuristic. If they're overweight they're likely indulgent and have poor restraint, if they don't keep clean they're likely negligent, if they don't dress "fashionably" they're likely either the former or have a specific vendetta against following norms when they don't see explicit self-benefit, if they look ragged they're likely low social status which jesus don't get me started on humans and social status.

It's not rock solid, but unless you want to spend a few months per person dating everyone then looks are a great way to narrow down your options quickly. The way we present ourselves is either the way we want to be presented or the limits of our ability to present, and that says a lot about a person. Even if logically it shouldn't.