I have written my own opinion on BDSM in an earlier post (See post history), but I can recommend reading on r/antikink for a nuanced take where everyone is vocally against it. One thing that stands out is that some posters on that sub says it's hard to find psychologists who are not "Sex positive" and frame BDSM as "Healthy outlet" by default.

I was addicted to online porn of the "D" in BDSM, imagining myself as a submissive getting disciplined non-violently. I don't remember much of my childhood, but I do remember periods where I got bullied temporarily (elementary school) and teased in general (I had a circle of friends up 'til high school, I was often the "butt of jokes"). One day it just clicked for me that outside of a sexualized setting, the "dom" would be a rude and/or abusive piece of sh*t I wouldn't wanna spend time with (Re: humiliating or degrading language to make the sub climax) so I started to leave BDSM porn.

It was all 100% online for me. Started with getting fascinated by reading about things like "Subspace"... back when I was like 14.15 years old or something. (I had internet access since 8 or 9 I think? Porn at 12 y.o. (which I regret now)). My most cherished "subspace" memory is the (Trigger warning/read at own risk:>! Praise Kink) within the Pet Play genre -!< which probably has to do with me wanting dopamine/oxytocin release due to having low self-esteem in daily life...

(Oxytocin is related to things like hugs, social accomplishments/human bonding, IRL sex climax. I depleted mine to virtual images on my computer screen for maaaaany years withou balancing it with social contact. I'm introverted but I also see other introverts who still have social lives/circle of friends)