You know what...even though you've behaved like a chode-king during this conversation, you really don't sound like a bad guy

Ditto. You will never believe me, but I do have some respect for you. Insults aside, you've debated the ideas fairly, in a hostile subreddit, no less, which is a pleasant change. Usually, everything I write is transformed into demonic reverse Latin, somehow.

With that said -

People suffering from possible social ostracization, sexual incelism and a general lack of masculine validation in their lives don't need you valiantly posting vaguely offensive, condescension and belittlement from the safety of the BluePill circlejerk.

I've also posted it in /r/mensrights, FeMRAdebates, and the redpill, too.

Also -

Are you blind to the not at all vaguely offensive condescension and belittlement directed towards women and men who aren't seen as sufficiently masculine coming from that sub?

I mean, I'm pretty sure we keep lists. Women are eternal adolescents? Hahaha, cute. You've simply reversed society's idiot stereotype about man children, and called it progress.

We tried that, already. It wasn't nearly as helpful as you all pretend. By any objective measure, quality of life is sky high compared to back then.

But back to the vitriol...

I'm going to trust you. I'll probably regret it, but...

Here's my confession - whether or not you use it as a weapon against me, is your choice. You can hurt me bad, if you choose...

I mirror other people's approach to me and those I care for, because I have a disease, which damages my core personality, while leaving the part of my brain that reacts to others unaffected. This generally means I'm both as sensitive as the best of us, and an asshole troll as much as the worst, and it takes a lot of time and mind hacks to work around any display of hate, so I can play with civilized folk.

Other times, I just roll with that. It can be a catharsis to tear people apart - not much different from the angry red pill kind, I suspect.

Sometimes, it can even be educational. People have no idea how cruel their text looks in a vacuum, without tone or context to soften it. A mirror can be instructive.

What I've done since arriving here, is taken the worst shit highly upvoted shit post logic I've seen in the redpill, and well, just judo flipped it.

I'd like to claim my motives were all noble, but really - it was more about trying to hurt you guys back.

And the reason for that, is because right now, I'm fighting depression. And you'll never understand why. I have what many of you want - young women who are turned on by me. Who declare their passionate love for me.

And I don't know how to make it stop.

And the redpill has no answers. It denies that the need could even exist. It also denies that I could know anything on the subject of women, since I'm kind of the opposite of redpill, so I can't even use the information to help any of you get laid, either.

No doubt, you're skeptical.

So, allow me to explain? Try to keep an open mind.

Are you familiar with emotional/erotic transference? It's the easiest way to accidentally seduce someone. Therapists have a code of ethics that prevent them from ever exploiting it. The barrier between a patient and a client is sacred.

Unfortunately for me, due to some really horrible shit that should never happen to a child....I was practically raised in therapy. Worse, because I wanted to help others, I studied advanced human psychology/sexuality while other kids were learning how to play sports. And make friends.

Now, it's all first nature to me. I see a problem, I have to help. Sometimes, I see too much.

I've saved lives. It's all that keeps me going, sometimes.

But.

I still don't know how to put up barriers, the way professionals do. They don't teach that in group therapy. I try, and they get knocked down as easily as if they weren't there. Add a medically damaged sense of self, and the fact that these days, the only true me, is when I'm with someone else...

And so, offline, people feel safe, with me. Like they can say anything. Even people who've never trusted anyone else before. Even if they have problems like borderline, or are sociopaths...they feel they can trust me with their true selves...

Because they can.

And men and women who talk freely about love, and lust, who remember it...sometimes, they feel those remembered emotions around me, and they think it means more.

How do you convince people that any desire, any love, they're feeling for you, isn't actually real? It's just a crush? Especially when you're a terrified kid who doesn't know why this keeps happening? I don't know many fairy tales, I was promised before I understood why I was always only ever good for a rush of romance and...other things...

By the way, I have a fear of sex. And I have sexual assault PTSD. If a stranger turns me on, it's flight or fight, or freeze triggers.

Yeah, I know triggers are the favorite punchline over there.

Are you familiar with exposure therapy? Because a lot of women are. Especially if they've studied psychology too. And so many wanted to help. After all, we were friends. Close friends. And of course...

Sometimes they wanted it to be more.

Some of them whether I was ready for it or not. Or whether I resisted...

So, yeah, I'm pretty fucked up, when it comes to sex.

Maybe now, you understand why I think feminism helped me more than the manosphere? Because you guys can't even acknowledge someone like me could possibly even exist.

Right now, there are three women who...

They're all polyamorous. They know about each other. I care for all of them.

And I am alone. I don't know how to make many friends, who don't eventually want to...

I feel like I'm just a convenient sexual/romantic release. Too disgusting to make the kind of friends who just want to hang out and have fun together? I mean, I have one friend who has never confessed a crush on me.

And most of these friends leave, the moment they find someone who doesn't break their heart.

I'm sure it will happen again.

I don't know how to trust anyone, anymore.

Except...there's a good woman who did the exact same thing - friendship, lust, love...but she's not throwing me to the wolves. She's breaking the pattern.

And she wants me to move in with her, and her wife. And I don't know, where this is going...if I move halfway across the country, what can I lose? What if her wife stops being okay with this?

I'm so afraid, of how this will end.

I'm just as burned, in my own way, as any one of you...even if it seems only women ever relate...

Anyways...that's my confession. Laugh your ass off at what a hypersensitive mangina I am, or submit to /r/thathapppened.

Who said pity was my solution?

So what is your solution, for those you think have no hope? At this point, I'd rather just hear you in your own words...

And yes, I know that's where we should have begun, and you owe me nothing, at this point.

If I made #KillAllWomen today, how do you think that'll go for me?

Someone beat you to it, and nobody cared. I know this sounds like a gotcha, but - how is your abstract reasoning? I don't know how to answer this further, without knowing which mode of thought, abstract or concrete, you're more comfortable with, assuming you have a preference?

"I can do something, therefore, everyone can do it, and if they can't, they're broken and have mental issues!"

No. You're reading a stigma that isn't there. The human brain is a complex structure, and not an invulnerable one. An inability to understand abstract thought isn't as serious a handicap to living in society as those I struggle with, but it shouldn't be dismissed, either.

Too many things aren't explained, to those who don't have a natural instinct for it.

The manosphere is quite literally the single, and only location for real, practical, actionable advice or none of these men would have shown up here.

This is why I keep returning to abstract thought. The information is out there, but it assumes you only need a few basic landmarks to find your way to the destination. If you struggle with empathy, and advanced concepts that group many actions under single umbrella labels without ever spelling them out...

It seems like the world is deliberately hiding the information you need.

I've watched the breakdown in communication happen over and over again.

Not that you need to believe me. And who knows what you know, that I don't, which is going to make this all look incredibly naive', patronizing, stupid, arrogant, whatever bad faith you choose to give my voice.

But...I'm going to assume good faith on your part. And ask if you'd like a truce, at this point? We at least both seem to give a shit about the issue of lonely men, anyways.

You don't need to stop insulting me or anything. But hopefully, we can at least agree to try to assume each other's motives are deeper than hate?