The reality is that pregnancy and childbirth are a risk to us all whether able bodied or not. Childrearing is also challenging without the added stressor of chronic pain or mental illness. I personally struggle with anxiety and depression which made me hesitant to have a child because I wasn't sure if I could raise one without drowning.

I decided to ttc while still in my late 20's in the hopes that I would have more energy while still young and honestly to get the first couple of years over with. I put a lot of things in place beforehand though because I knew I would struggle with certain aspects– namely I became a SAHM and made sure I had access to therapy. If you do decide to move forward with kids I'd recommend doing the same. Not staying at home necessarily, but what supports will you put in place for yourself for when you're struggling? That should be an important part of the conversation imo whether you adopt or have one biologically.

I wish there was a way to guarantee certain things or at least know about them beforehand but there is not. When it comes to having kids only you and your partner can decide if the reward is worth the risk. Good luck with your decision. We are also one and done because I cannot realistically handle more although I wish that I could.