I feel like people who say "make your own TV show" is as bad as saying "deal with it". You know he/she isn't going to do that, seems to be just a way of ending a good discussion going on.
While a lot of people don't seem to mind that minorities aren't getting lead roles as often, I don't see a reason why they get stereotyped(in a negative way) more often than not. I think a lot of people perceive it as people in the industry are going out of their way to make minorities play in stereotyped roles. I mean a lot of people (not you; in a general sense) always like to say that whenever issues on minorities are brought up that they are playing the race card, no one ever questions why the card is in the deck in the first place. I'm not purposely trying to put words in your mouth but what I got from you is that men in minorities aren't playing lead roles because the movies/shows are made to appeal to the largest audience and it's where the money is at, I personally think the reason may run deeper than that but I can't elaborate on it.
I don't think there's anything wrong with film makers appealing to their intended target demographic, but I reckon it's crossing the line when it has the be done at a minorities expense, generally with racist stereotypes. It's pretty common for any minority to have their opinion deemed overly sensitive when they mention issues like these which is why I think (like you) that it is difficult to talk about race issues within the media anywhere.
While the OP was talking on issues on both sides I think he was leaning towards problems concerning asian guys which I find it hard to talk about since you have no experience in that, not to say you can't have an opinion on the issue at hand. I understand you were talking about the problem of asian women being fetishised which the OP also mentioned in his post.
The problem seems to be ingrained deeper than it appears and I don't think I'm well versed on the issue enough to have a solid opinion and speak out on it.
I'm sorry, I don't mean to get into an argument but when you said
These white men in Asian roles are fulfilling white men's desire to be with an Asian girl.
Something about that just sounds so wrong.