No, both are not stupid, you need to get off that fence. Choosing your partner based mutually on nothing but lust guarantees a short relationship that is subject to the whims of pure biology and carnal desires. It is not stable and the family that follows is usually a side effect of the relation rather than one of its primary goals. A relationship chosen based on academics and financial stability is already much smarter as it involves long-term thinking. Ability to obtain a degree and financial stability hints at many qualities beneficial to building a stable family and relationship.

Are these the only things one should look at for their partner? Obviously not. But drawing an equivalence to the purely carnal relationships that typify the West since the advent of Tinder and such? That’s highly low IQ.