Anxiety/Depression (including ocd/sa)

Every time I get a grip on things and my life starts going decent, something gets really messed up and my life turns into chaos.

I don't think people understand that once you shift mentally and your demons gain momentum, it takes a while to slow them down. It's really out of your control in many ways, even if it doesn't seem to be the case from a third person perspective.

I manage to be somewhat successful in the traditional sense, but while doing so I feel like a bat that accidentally got into an apartment building. I'm crashing and burning into walls and furniture as if I have no navigational skills.

I think I had an experience a few years ago, where I mentally went to such a crazy place; it's the type of thing where the symptoms improve, and you do get much better, but once you've seen how deep your mind can go, it's the thing that separates you from other people for the rest of your life.

That said, I really do a lot of different things to keep myself running smoothly. This week has just been one of those weeks that I mentioned; the momentum gained and caught me, so I'm feeling negative haha