I once said to a white person that my skin tends to be naturally dryer since I’m black. Their eyes got big and they informed me my comment was a racist statement. They added that “people of all races have dry skin”. This was someone who considered themselves left leaning and anti-racist. I was simply making an observational statement about my skincare needs.

Another time I went on a shopping trip with a white acquaintance. I asked the cashier to pass me the “thingamajigger” and the acquaintance said, “Don't say that”. Afterward, they tried to convince me to stop saying the word because it was too similar to that word. I’ve been saying that word forever and no one’s ever looked at me funny or made that connection.

I'm not sure if these examples apply to your point, but I’m glad those friendships faded out. There are more examples, but it was like my race was on their mind more than it was on my mind and it made me highly suspicious long-term.