During counseling I think a good way to approach the conversation would not be to start the discussion with things like "I wish you made ___ dollars per year." That won't be productive. The better way to start that discussion is what your shared goals are. Is it to have kids? Is it to have a house for said kids? Is it traveling? Retiring at a certain point? Stuff like that. And then discuss the road to get there.

It may mean she needs to make more money, it may not. I'm actually with her that personal fulfillment and happiness are incredibly important but at the same time fulfillment doesn't pay the bills. So sometimes sacrifices need to be made.

Food for thought.