UPDATE - My boyfriend has crossed my boundaries multiple times making me feel disrespected and gross but he promises to never do it again

It's how many people have talked to me, a rape victim. No one deserves a pass but people also need to lay out their boundaries in the first place, and if those boundaries are pushed to take action right away. OP was vague about the first incidents but then in this post sounds like she won't even allow a simple hug since they've started dating. So to me it sounds like she isn't into being intimate at all yet expected her bf to just exist without any form of intimacy.

She's been abused yes, but she needs to take time to decide what kind of intimacy she wants and what she doesn't want so her next relationship will be better.

Or, do you want me to say something like "she deserved to be raped because she's asexual?"

/r/relationship_advice Thread Parent