That’s a very good strategy to have. I have been doing that recently. When I have accomplished a lot and gotten done the things I need to do, I feel really good and reward myself by reading for a few hours or watching a tv show, or even play a video game for a little bit. It definitely makes me happy because then I know I earned that relaxation time.

One of my major focuses is being honest to myself and the people I’m closest with. I am very critical of myself but I don’t take criticism well haha. I react very poorly to criticism but I’m aware of it and I’ve started to work on receiving information like that in a better way. I have a hard time facing the truth. So much that I cry whenever I have to really speak about my feelings (tell him how bad things have gotten) to my father because I just feel 1000 things at once and don’t know what my life is anymore. I guess I have a breakdown of sorts because I have a lot of conflicting feelings. But through my honesty and truthfulness, I feel like weight has been lifted off of me, like I’m finally not alone carrying around all these negative thoughts. Eventually the negative ones turn to positive ones and I feel so much more free. It’s only just begun and my work won’t be easy but I promise myself I will be better because I know I deserve it and am worthy. The people around me who have supported me deserve to also see how effective and important their love and care is.

It’s also very nice speaking about things like this, it gives me a chance to really sort my thoughts, so I appreciate it.