[UPDATE] Just had ''The Discussion''

Honey, what ever you do hold on to this strength you're getting from here. And this feeling of doing whats right. I was in a three year emotional and physically abusive relationship. I always saw it as he never hit me it didn't count. I'm a smart woman but I was in way too deep believed far too much of the bullshit and was completely isolated from my friends and family. No fb. Monitored my phone. My call logs - text and email. He read my mail. Opened my packages. Viewed my browser history. We had to move states. I wasn't allowed to make friends. I wasn't allowed to work. I wasn't allowed to go to the shops my self. He cut me off from everyone I knew and everyone I loved. BUT!! He could be the sweetest guy. Broke my heart when he cried. Begged me not to leave when I threatened to walk. Told me I was his whole world and would die with out me....more accurately end his life with out me. And for three years I believed it. Then I grew some balls and one day I packed my shit and left. His mother lived with us. She had a serious issue with our dog and cats. If they meowed she would also lose it. If the dog barked it was something she deemed "punishable" I hated it. And the day I stood between her and smacking the dog...and I stood there alone while he watched was the day I knew that if I brought kids into that relationship it would be the biggest injustice to another human being I could do. All my pets ended up at the Rspca and I left with just the shit I could fit in my car. With him begging and pleading for me not to leave. But I did it. And I never felt more free. I've since learnt the sack of shit was cheating on me. He has moved on. He isn't suffering. Or going to knock himself off. He has let go and i have moved on too. He essentially wanted me for the cliché reason that he didn't want anyone else to have me- he didn't want anything taking focus off him - he considered me "his" I was his property in his mind. And he didn't want anyone else playing with his toy. I'm not saying your ex is the same but manipulators will say anything, absolutely anything to get you to go back to them. "this time will be different..." "things will change..." "we don't need to have kids...." it's all a lie. He doesn't believe it. So please don't you believe it either. Like others have said I suggest you look at ways to protect your cat when you are out. Look at ways to protect yourself. Believe me it takes a minute for someone who has always been "just" emotionally abusive to wind themselves up to a point where when you try to walk away they stop you.... Any way they can. Stay safe hun. Be true to yourself. Your wants. Your needs. Love life, love your kitty and never regret walking away from a controlling manipulative arsehole of a man who can't accept you for you, but wants you for who he can force you to be. Thoughts are with you. Xx

/r/childfree Thread