Not to be a nervous nellie or to plant any seed of doubt, but make sure this doesn’t devolve into something worse. Let me explain why…

When I first moved in with my boyfriend, he was unemployed. Would hardly engage with me. I supported us both, paid his child support, tried not to ask a lot of questions because he was going through a divorce getting finalized. We had sex maybe once every 3-4 MONTHS. Eventually I’d get tired of holding my tongue and start sheepishly asking what I could do to help. “I just need to get my head on straight. I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you…” and we’d have hours and hours of wonderful, tear-jerking conversations that would extend well into the morning hours. He would assure me things would get better.

Flash forward 5 years. He still hasn’t gotten a job, but every few months we’d do the same thing… I’d break down and tell him i couldn’t handle being ignored and he would ALWAYS apologize, cry, and swear that things would change.

Over the last 12 years, he’s worked a grand total of 2 of them (part time, he claims his PTSD and depression are too severe to maintain a job). Kept getting rejected for disability benefits. We’re divorcing now. He still swears things will change… but 12 years is a lot of time to give someone who ended up just playing on my emotions in exchange for getting his child support payments made and not having to work/put in any effort.