UPDATE: WTF its escalating: Gender politics compromising my education at college. Losing sleep over it. Dreading attending classes that I once prioritized.

I would say, if the allegations are false, then you should act unconcerned

Agreed. But shouldn't I convey that I'm concerned for my future? Or that I'm so confident that they are false I'm not concerned?

If there's no lawyers, then you need to be very prepared for tomorrow. Don't offer any information on yourself unless prompted. Force them to offer a solution. Ask them to tell you what the accusations are specifically so you can defend yourself. Ask for evidence.

Preparing myself with what I believe to be the best advice in this thread. Taking notes and visualizing the meeting. I will be asking questions but not answering. If they try to trap me and its looking serious, I'll remain silent or say I think thats better suited with my lawyer present.

Also, remember they aren't using logic, they are using emotions. That means if you bring your side of the argument in to defend yourself you will lose, it will trigger them even more. Defeat their argument based on their reasoning, which should be easy since they aren't using logic

Do you care to elaborate on this? I agree that I should not defend myself other than denying any allegations. I won't state my case. But you're saying to defeat their argument how? I'm not sure I'd be able to pull off what you're alluding to or I'm misunderstanding.

Also try not to make it a pity party for yourself, be understanding of their situation, and casually mention that people have conflicting personalities, you felt an urge to file a complaint also but felt like it would be in the better interest of both parties to just make do until the project was over. If you can get out of this by just changing streams or making do your best and just laying low till it's over do it, isolate yourself if necessary, and just get it over with.

I agree that making a pity party is a bad course of action. I will show understanding and a willingness to cooperate without actually cooperating. I'm not sure about slipping in people having conflicting personalities, may show that I understand why she has complained. I'm also not sure about the file a complaint thing, but I honestly was going to hold a meeting prior to her filing a complaint because I saw it coming. Not sure if I should say this either to be honest because again, it will legitimize that something occurred. I'm going to change streams and I think I will bring up that I decided to change streams as I felt this was a major distraction and was advised to do so by my instructor whom I trust. I have been laying low and isolating myself but it hasn't been advantageous, especially for how this program/industry...works. Honestly, i don't need this schooling and I'm having drop out fantasies but that'd only fuel the fire.

/r/asktrp Thread Parent