The amount of just no behavior coming from the mods of justnomil deeply saddens me. I liked many of the mods and feel i largely had good interactions with them save for one specific mod ill not name for her privacy.

While I may not be a part of the community that was racially targeted, I am honestly disgusted to know just how many mods actively participated or willingly ignored such a glaring and dangerous problem. The problem of racism has claimed lives and will continue to do so as long as racism lives. To allow it to flourish and go so far as to protect it for so long is dangerous to the very real people using this site/sub. This was unforgivable.

The corruption, racism, blatant and wanton abuse I have witnessed over the last several months leading into this current mushroom cloud has permantly ruined any trust I have in any of the mods over there, including those I previously thought highly of. As those who refused to speak up are just as guilty as those who willingly and ignorantly ignored the many users that came forward with polite and well written concerns for the harm being done.

I lurked and commented despite needing advice because modgate 1.0 showed me what happened behind the scenes. Little did i know that was only scratching the surface.

A part of me is concerned that mods themselves were behind several of the buzzfeed leaks and fake saga stories. The lack of transparency and willy nilly ban spree makes this all the more suspect to me. To be entirely honest, the writing styles of several mods concern me due to the similarity and sometimes mirror of writing in some of the fake posts. This may be entirely coincidental but I find it very suspect in light of recent events.

It troubles me that people who willingly volunteered to be the protectors of a vulnerable advice and support sub would willingly abuse their users. It troubles me more that one particular mod (who ill not name) blatantly enjoyed the abuse she dished out both in comments and PMs to not only myself but many other users. And yet not one person recieved an apology. That mod is still a mod (unless i am behind and something has finally been done). And she will continue to abuse users verbally as its been made perfectly clear that her behavior was acceptable and will not receive consequences.

I am angry. I am hurt. But more then anything, i am disappointed. I watched justnomil provide so much love and support to so many who needed it in dark times (myself included), only to then watch it poison itself due to childish antics and high school dramatics.

There is no apology that could ever repair the damage the mods of justnomil have inflicted against some of its most vulnerable users. This was an unforgivable, and an entirely cruel act. We are not idiots, in a sub full of advice for dealing with this exact behavior they cannot pull the wool over our eyes.

I may not be able to fix the problem. But i most definitely see it. And to every one who was negatively affected by any of this, I want you to know how sorry i am. You are valid. You are loved and worth it.

To everyone that stood up for each other, called out the racism and bullshit, who watched quietly and observed, to every one that did not participate in the hate circle jerk, I want to thank you.

Despite the implosion of justnomil I have met or seen so so many people come together in an amazing show of support, solidarity and kindness. And if nothing else, I want every one to remember that while this bullshit was going on, hundreds of people banded together without knowing anyone's real name just to show their love to one another. And thats pretty Goddamn beautiful. While there was a dark cloud looming, users still showed the very best of themselves to each other and that makes me feel extremely proud.