This stuff that’s going on in Texas… it’s REAL fuckin because the only other time I can recall was at Sandy Hook and that was real close to home. That shit really doesn’t happen around here. Just… how? The Buffalo thing was real close too.

And I would have gotten doordash too (since my dad apparently goes to the grocery store to return beer cans and buys nothing but beer since we don’t get EBT anymore) but I can’t eat, I’m so depressed.

And it was at this hour my mom died five years ago.

Oh yeah and I just broke up with C a couple hours ago. Yeah, that happened. At the same time.

Like, we were just friends, and she wanted to date girls, and I was cool with that. I didn’t realize she meant as an exclusive partner. Because I have such a different idea of sex. I thought she still loved me, as I know she once did. We came to the conclusion that I’m a bigger slut than she is, lol. Growing up in a hippie family will do that to you I guess.

But with the statements she made earlier, something isn’t adding up. I’ve been real quiet about this out of respect for her, but I’ll say it… she is actively using right now. When she does this, she usually says some BS about why she can’t answer. As a result, I don’t take her seriously. And that’s not good. Hell, I don’t take MYSELF seriously when it comes to this shit.

Lil sis should be up this weekend and I’m hoping to see her friend G who also broke up with her fiancé. Should be nice to have someone to talk about that with and get my mind off all the shit.