Weekly Vents and Successes Thread- June 15, 2020

I feel this! People can be so different over text than they are in person. Sometimes you think there's this great chemistry and then in person it's not there and it's so disappointing. Don't lose hope! Dating really is a numbers game. You just have to put in the time to set up multiple dates with multiple people to find the one that you actually clique with. It also makes it easier if it doesn't work out on a date because you have another set up for next week.

I've been setting up a FaceTime date before we meet for this reason. I talk to them about a week and facetime a few times. It's not exactly the same as in person, but I've found that if we can have fun and easy conversation on video call, if/when we have an actual date it's so much less awkward and things go better. I highly recommend it! Especially on tinder I found pre-screening with video call helps weed out the guys who lie and say they're looking for a relationship but are only interested in saying whatever to hook up. That's because when I meet someone online a lot of the time we'll meet up for coffee or something low key before we go on a date-date to see if we have any chemistry.

The problem is the dudes that have no interest in actually dating you will take you on the cheapest or most low effort place (and will split the bill) because they don't want to put in too much effort for someone they just want to pump and dump. By face-timing a few times, it allows us to see if we have chemistry in a way that is hard to see over text, then if he likes me he can take me on an actual date, like dinner or another activity. Guys on dating apps who want to hook up will rarely do dinner dates unless they want to create a situation where he can act like she "owes" him. Which has also happened to me. This way they have no excuse not to plan a proper date.

Idk, it's helped me filter better

/r/dating_advice Thread Parent