That sub souds interesting, although I am not quite sure I understand it.
Since you commented, I thought I would add that shortly before I dove into psychedelics, I had a dream that felt prophetic. In this dream I got the sense that my potential would be fulfilled at that time, although the number 2050 may have been a miscalculation due to historical use of the base 10 numbering system and it might actually be sooner, like 2042 or something. There are 13 moons in a year so there should be 13 months and all our dating since adopting the Gregorian calendar is bringing us further from being able to make accurate predictions.
I saw a terrible invasion of aliens that could be the apocalypse for mankind. The being that was communicating to/through me suggested that this would be a test for our race, and I would be the Earth's hero. The aliens' great weapon resembled a tremendous black dragon in a shape similar to this, although it seemed it might also be a metaphor for some technological war machine. In order to fulfill my destiny I would have to master and tame this beast to turn it against the invaders, and violate my wish for being a peaceful non-violent person and become the killing machine, entering the heart of the beast and merging with it.
Months later I acquired some MXE and was going to test it out after enjoying ketamine and reading wonderful reviews online (this was years ago when it was easily available at ~$35/g). I was going to take a little bump of ~20mg but I spilled some on my shorts and said "fuck it" and snorted it up with a straw. I estimate that dose was somewhere between 80 and 150 mg. I holed HARD, and had an intense out-of-body experience where I was visited again by this dark destroyer/transformer demigod being I could only associate with the mythological Shiva, and the experience reaffirmed the vision I had before.
After I stopped taking effexor, I did not have any more experiences like that for a few years until recently when I was prescribed a different antidepressant that made me manic and I abused LSD and other things again. Then I had another experience where this "being" told me that my prior experiences were not an illusion, but that it may take more time for me to understand. I did not have to have all the answers at the current time, and I wouldn't be able to understand them anyway with my feeble human brain. But I had to keep living and pressing forward, Shiva would guide me and I would experience yet more pain but in time the answers would reveal themselves. I would have good experiences too, but the painful and difficult experiences would harden me into the warrior I would need to become and unfold my inner strength/genius.
It is incredibly fascinating but I have always been a skeptic, never used drugs until I was 18 and have always been cautious except when I was on antidepressants. Part of me wants to dismiss it all as delusions, but another part of me wants to believe that it was a sign that some day I will do something very important. I still have hope that it is true that I will do something magnificent and meaningful before I die, and that there are forces beyond human understanding guiding our lives. I also like the idea that I am special, but the messenger made it clear that although I would play a big role, I was not the only one and there were many others that I would need to seek who would be just as important, if not more important, to the future of our world.
I also became obsessed over the black dragon symbolism and the other side of its coin, the red phoenix. The red phoenix might even be the main hero and I would be the right hand, and also the one to do the dirty work, but as partners in leadership. There was much more symbolism and obsessive pattern-finding, especially with the Knights of the Round table. I wanted/needed to identify the people that would become the members of my round table, and researched the individuals that were part of that mythological group e.g. King Arthur, Guenevere, and Lancelot. I thought I would probably be (metaphorically, or as a literal reincarnation) Merlin.
