He's so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Jason Kenney. We were best friends in politics. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... whatever. So then, I started being PM of my country, Canada, which is totally gorgeous. But then I moved to Parliament, and Kenney was like, weirdly jealous of it. Like, if I would blow him off to hang out with Canada, Kenney'd be like "Why didn't you call me back?". And I'd be like "Why are you so obsessed with me?".

So then, for my party, which was an all-Liberals pool party, I was like "Jason, I can't invite you because I think you're a conservative". I mean, I couldn't have a conservative at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their bathing suits. I mean, right? He was a CONSERVATIVE. So then his mom called my wife and started yelling at her, it was so ******ed. And then he dropped out of federal politics because no one would talk to him, and he came back in the fall to be a Premier, all of his hair was cut off and he was totally weird, and now I guess he's on crack.