You were the trigger.

Listen I don’t know you or your situation, but, if I had to venture a guess, I’d say that you are probably both somewhat at fault for whatever happened.

The same goes for the people before and after, for both of you. Because that’s how people work. Everybody has their issues. Nobody is 100% without fault in any emotional exchange.

Are there varying degrees of toxicity in different people? Sure. Do most people lack the self-awareness to take responsibility for their part in things? Absolutely.

But what I’ve noticed - on Reddit, in life, in my own exchanges - is that people tend to check out on each other once a crack is the armor is revealed.

There’s very little communication, and even less patience. Sympathy or understanding? Pretty much nonexistent.

And I get it, everyone has their own struggles. It’s hard to focus on someone else - helping them unpack their damage, giving them the safe space to be who they are, imparting your wisdom.

But the problem is that so often people pitch themselves as these benevolent, sympathetic beings. When the truth is that they don’t want to put the time into someone else. This is all just a distraction - especially on Reddit.

So this person that you’re posting about, clearly they have some toxicity going on. As do we all. Is it better to take some time to try and understand the why? Maybe help them grow?

It has to be better than just lighting them up in a post, right? I mean, sure, you probably feel better getting that off of your chest, but are you doing better?

Believe me, I’ve been guilty of it, too. I’ve ran so several girls off and then blamed them for our downfall, quite publicly. It’s hard to show restraint when you’re angry, hurt, or just plain fed up.

But I think that’s the big lesson I’ve taken away from all of this. To learn that restraint, that humility, that maturity, that self-awareness. I’m not there, but I’m getting there.

But what the hell do I know? I’m just another random dipshit on Reddit. Haha. Sorry for the rant. Carry on with your day.

/r/UnsentLetters Thread