What 3 fictional characters do you mostly identify with?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately about a specific character - L from Death Note. I don't think I relate to anyone more closely than him, fictional or otherwise. It's like looking in a proverbial mirror, or perhaps more accurately watching a dramatized version of myself. The ideal version of myself. I aspire to be more like him. He's an idol and a role model to me. Lately I've been imagining him standing there when I feel a lack of motivation. My productivity has been higher than it's been in months.

Nearly everything about him I see in myself. His behavior, his mannerisms, his outlook, even his appearance. The bony frame, the slouched posture, pale skin, the rings under dark eyes, the dark, messy hair and lazy clothes. Even our expressions are similar - heavy-lidded and exhausted in appearance or wide-eyed, seemingly stunned, with little in between. As well as Asperger's, it's been suggested that he has Marfan's syndrome - a condition which tends to give those afflicted a gaunt, lanky appearance and spidery fingers. My mother has been insisting I have it for years. It's almost silly how many resemblances there are between us. I've even got a sometimes crippling sweet tooth and a penchant for caffeine.

But what makes him most relatable to me is how he interacts with others. They respect him, they see him as a friend, but he is obviously an "other" to them. He's something alien and incomprehensible and a little unnerving to them. He has an intricate knowledge of typical human behavior, can even emulate in certain situations, but can't comprehend it at a personal level. He's separate from them. This is why I relate to him. I hope to one day meet someone like him.

I know that you asked for 3 characters, but L outshines all others to such a degree that none can really compare. That said, I tend to gravitate towards the unemotional types. Not the exaggerated ones with the blank faces and complete lack of variation in tone, but the calm, logical ones. Particularly those who don't particularly regard social conventions or interpersonal relationships, and those who don't give in to pleasure. Data from TNG comes to mind. Sherlock Holmes is an obvious choice, though I've only really seen the recent BBC adaption, and I find him a little too arrogant and emotional to relate to all that much. I suspect if I read the original stories I'd relate to him very much.

I also relate to characters who always seem a little out of place or uncomfortable, like Louis CK in Louie, or the Narrator from Fight Club, or Harry Caul from The Conversation, which I just watched today. A lot of characters like these tend to be portrayed as kind of timid or cowardly, though, which I don't relate to at all. It's just that constant state of semi-delirium induced by a semi-comprehensible world. That I relate to.

In literature, I related to D-503 from We to some degree, due to his inability to comprehend his own emotion, and his being torn between (addictive, irrational) emotion and (beautiful, serene) logic. I also related to Quentin from The Sound and the Fury, as he spends his part of the book lost in memories and the scenery around him, not really seeming to follow the words and actions of those around him, or know how to respond to them. I relate to characters who seem like strangers wherever they go. Sorry for the essay. As I said, this has been on my mind lately.

/r/aspergers Thread